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And so my MSN personal msg says. I feel quite horrible now.
Watching this anime about music, La Corda d Oro, made me re-ignite my passion for music. And then i remember dance. I wanna draw too. To compare these with my liking for karate, it just pales in comparison. And so i'm thinking..
While discussing OG stuff with Hasan last night, i had a glimpse at the mechanics of leadership and the messiness of human relations. Am i up to it? To be a OGL for this year's Union Camp? Im glad i have him as a co-OGL. :) He was my fright-night partner. I wont run out on him again. Have been feeling bad since then cuz at one station, a 'ghost' suddenly crawled out so rapidly from under a cloth that i took flight and ran. I felt like i should have stood by him as my action (i tink) make him jittery thereafter.
Just now as i was reading my sociology of emotions course pack, i felt happy. Though it was tinged with sadness (why~). I had this feeling last night too when i was doing my kanji homework. I had a few more enlightenments from the course pack. It was something about Shame. The symptoms of it and the shame-anger spiral that results from it, i feel it keenly often. After realizing that this is what i have been feeling, i thought 'why should it be so'? I wanna change this. Discontent in my heart now.
Time is running out..
Also, overheard from my elder sis that she have booked a airplane ticket in June already. To go off who knows how long this time. And there's my elder brother going off for his Exchange Programme at New Zealand in the second half of this year. And there's just me and lil sis left. So now there's the feeling of loneliness.
A sense that exams are drawing near. Im finally starting to feel it. Will i be able to revise well with so many things on my mind? Heh. Let it go..
Let's get this night over and done with. I will feel better tomorrow with the sun. p.s. my desktop has a beautiful, vivid photo of a sunflower against a blue sky. Ahh.
