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HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MEEE!!!
Haha. Yay it's my bday! But im not happy yet cuz no one is at home. :(
Yesterday nite when i was studying at the balcony aka my exclusive study room, a gust of cold wind blew (hopefully not the sinisterly "Yin" type) and i felt so lonely and hollow. Though everybody is at home doing their own ting, leading their own lives. The balcony is situated the furthest away from the living room so i do feel isolated at times. Unless there are 'visitors'. My lil sis to blabber about her sch day, band, and making feel excited that my bday is tml (ie today). Cuz she said my present is related to anime. So i listed all my favs, but she kept shaking her head. She said its so nice that she even wants it for herself. Oooo.. After half an hour of precious studying time flew by guessing, she left the study room with this last teaser "Actually, its not about anime". -_-" But i felt so weak and yielding. Cuz e kaypoh me cant stand a good secret. haha.
Why cant i be like myself when im at home, compared to when im in school or outside? Its frustrating. People who think they know me will be surprised if they spy at me when im at home. Like im 2 different people. Not schizo plz. Perhaps when im outside, their is this 'proper' behaviour that i stick to, assuming a 'perfect' facade. And it all hangs loose when im at home. Which is really like the main character in this manga "Kare Kano", a really old (199?) but meaningful high-sch romance+comedy shojo series. Im a tough nut to crack. I only open up to people who do not judge by appearances. Those generous, big-hearted pp who u all are. :)
Anyway, thanks to A, SY, B, WL, Dina for staying up so late juz to wish me stuff at the magical hour. :) And Heon and Kimberlyn msged me too! so surprised. Luckilyy i didnt delete their no. *guilt* Thank u lynn! Juz received ur msg haha.
I went for some retail therapy at cwpt and NTUC. Received a $30 NTUC voucher from my brother. So far i bought lots of food, a Oral B toothbrush (e best brand! even good for scrubbing the toilet floor!), and Ginvera Green tea complete facial wash (hope its good. The first ingredient is Ginseng! Nxt is green tea. Hope its by order of quantity and not quality -.-) Give me a break today! Though its 8 days to D-day, n im not supposed to be here haha.
Im really irritated when im forcing myself to study. Angry even. And i sit on a small plastic chair till my bottom hurts. Putting a cushion doesnt help. :( How am i gonna do well if i continue with the way i am now?? Though today's chem lect made me gan jiong again, (i failed chem mock! n i dun _stand a whit of that darn org chem Q8!), its effect is wearing off as the sleepy effect takes over me.
I really luv my mp3 player! The old soft-rock english songs (thx SY!!), soothing, melancholy chinese love ballads, and upbeat L'arc.. But i concentrate better without them haha.
Deathnote! I shall watch u after A's when i rent u! The Prestige too! And Princess Hours! My mom n lil sis juz recently finished a marathon of it. Got the DVD. N i kept dropping by juz to peek.
off to kaypoh and a quick nap then! I made some lemon n raspberry jelly last nite. Its nice and quivering (like in that dinosaur movie, J(?) Park) now. Let me rest a while today.. :)
